A View from the Floor

Sounds fun, eh?

Sorry. It’s a rant. Of sorts. Likely to be short but something I have to get off my chest.

Ok. So over on MDS there was a forum post asking what, exactly, folks meant when they say “so and so is only in it for the kink”. Most replied that it was a superior, snubbing, nose thumbing, derogatory insult.  And, yanno, for some that may be the case.

But I don’t look at it that way.

For me, it’s something I say to differentiate those who are into power exchange and those who are into kink.

I’m not demeaning those who are into kink.

It may come across that way but I have to honestly say that it’s your own perception if you feel I’m being demeaning, perhaps your own insecurities or disagreement with the way I do things. It is not my intention to belittle or minimize what you do.

Here’s a reality check for you.

Almost all my real time, true life, face to face lifestyle friends are not 24/7.

One couple is in it purely for the kink. Not a drop of power exchange in their relationship. They just love to try new, kinky, fun things. They love to spice things up in the sack. And I love them.

Another couple admits that they could never do 24/7 and have no wish to. They’ve been married for a long time, they swing, and they love bondage and power exchange in the right time and place. They spend long weekends indulging in both but put it aside easily when that time is over. I love them, too.

I could go on and on but it would bore you if I explained the dynamic of each of my friends. The point is Taylor and I are actually in the minority in our 24/7 status amongst our group of friends.

And you better believe none of us are putting each other down for our choices or demeaning each other for what we do or don’t do.

However…

HOWEVER…

I also don’t go asking my kink only friends for advice about my 24/7 relationship. Our bondage and swinger friends don’t ask me for advice about what they do. We all realize and accept that we’re different and don’t try to butt in to stuff we don’t really understand.

Unlike online.

Sure, people might get a little snarky, give you shit about just being in it for the kink when you stick your nose into a conversation with your own attitude and advice about something you don’t understand.

You can pretty much expect it when, being a kinkster, you hop into a discussion about 24/7 and say ridiculous things in your lack of understanding or even desire to have what’s being discussed.

When you insert comments like ” It’s all about how to choose to play the game. (I use the word intentionally, mainly because I don’t go in for putting things up on a pedestal.)” in a discussion with someone who finds power exchange to be a way of life, a reality and not something they “play” at…

You’re gonna get a bad response.

So, really, I guess my point is…

Sure, there are some 24/7 folks who snub their noses at anything less.

And there are some kinky folks who find the 24/7 people ridiculous and delusional.

And there are gazillions of folks somewhere in between.

If you don’t want to be demeaned and belittled for your choices, perhaps the best way to prevent that is to keep your own opinion about things you neither do nor understand to yourself.

What you say and do directly influences the reactions and responses you get.

Don’t complain about them if you couldn’t keep your own mouth shut.

Don’t belittle what I do and I won’t belittle what you do. Don’t insert your dubious wisdom about something you don’t participate in and I won’t have to tell you you’re talking out of your ass.

And visa versa, yanno.

I feel great guilt sometimes over not writing here enough.

I read so many BDSM, D/s or M/s related blogs that are a daily journey thru the trials and tribulations, joys and wonder, play and punishment of other’s relationships. I get to feeling like I should…  say more.

And then I realize I don’t have to.

That’s not what this place is for. It never has been.

And, besides, after so many years together most of our daily junk is just daily junk. Routine, ordinary life with our own particular D/s twist. It’s nothing anyone wants to read about. It’s nothing “new” or “fresh” or even particularly kinky.

It just is.

Life.

If I were to attempt to write something meaningful and deep every day I’d fail. My urge to write comes in spurts and stutters, my epiphanies rare jewels. (To me, anyhow)

My daily D/s is no longer worth exploring. I much prefer to live it, to enjoy it, to revel in it and relish it. I don’t need to pick it apart or share the minutiae with the masses.

And, lately, I’ve been content. I’ve been inactive on web forums or in the local community - no one has been pissing me off or chafing my ass. I have nothing to rile me up, nothing big to talk about.

And that’s ok.

Disappointing to some of you, perhaps.

But, damn, I’m happy.

Eventually the urge to write, to purge my brain of some seemingly momentous thought will strike. And I’ll write.

Until then…

May each and every one of you have a Blessed Yule, a very, Merry Christmas and a safe and beautiful New Year.

Taylor’s been teasing me with rope a little bit lately.

I’m not sure if it’s been intentional teasing…  though knowing him it has been.

The other day he dragged it up from the basement and had me wash it.

Then he sat at his desk and played with it the next couple nights. (Occasionally asking things like “gettin’ twitchy over there, puss?”)

So when he pulled it out again last night I didn’t think much of it. I figure he’s getting comfortable with it, yanno? Practicing small stuff and thinking of things to do with it. Planning, as he tends to do, silently and intently so that when he does decide to use it he has a direction, a rough map in his mind.

I was wrong.

Somehow I ended up in a rope bra sort of thing with a strategic rope wedgie and my hands wrapped firmly behind my back.

I somehow ended up with crazy clamps on my nipples too.

And oddly enough I also ended up slurping dick like a starved beggar not even caring that it had been my plan that I’d get laid later and that obviously wasn’t happening.

And, yanno, strangely I just didn’t care about those silly screwed up plans when I also ended up arched almost off the floor, mindless of the bound arms crushed painfully underneath me while I writhed against that knotted wedgie when he took the clamps off.

There’s just something about rope…

Maybe it’s simply that it’s new to me.

Maybe it’s the sensual slide of it against flesh, flesh that grows more sensitive with each whisper of rope across it.

Maybe it’s the helplessness. The ache.

The firm feeling of being…  bound. Physically fucking bound.

The startling knowledge that I can’t bat his hands away or protect myself in any way.

It’s not the bondage itself, per say. I’ve been cuffed with both metal and leather.

It’s the damned rope.

As a whole. All the sensations, emotions and reactions that twine together to make it a whole experience.

Amazing to me how I could be so wholly satisfied, get so fully into the event.

A small, stolen moment on a bland sort of Tuesday night given greatness by some rope and a sexy, determined, dominant man.

Wow.

Sometimes I just don’t want to do something.

Most times that something is small.

Like taking off his filthy, smelly boots when he gets home.

I want to whine and suggest he do it himself.

And then I remember;

Only I get to do this for him.

No one else.

Just me.

And I remember that it’s a privilege.

And I do it with a smile.

Perhaps I need to remember that more often.

Keep it just that simple.

I know it appears, sometimes, when you leave a comment that it just vanishes.
It does it to me on occasion as well.
You type, click submit, enter in the little spam security text and…. poof. Nothing.

I don’t know why this happens but I actually am getting the comments.
They just don’t seem to show up on the blog until I read them thru my dashboard thingy first.
It seems as though once I do that they then show up on the blog itself.

A small glitch here, I guess, but worth it to me for the adult hosting.

Anyhow…
When it seems your comments are eaten don’t despair.
I get them.

And appreciate them muchly!

Hope y’all have a great weekend!

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